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Missing my grandsons

Napsal: 11.10.2017 12:08:30
od JoeClark
Hello Everyone.

I have a 3 year old grandson and a 9 year old step-grandson that I haven't seen since December 2016. I was in my grandson's life from the time he was born. My son got married October 1, 2016 and that is when the problems started. His wife (not my grandson's mother) is known to our family due to the fact my oldest on went to school with her. In fact he also dated her when they were still in high school. We know back then she had been on drugs but has been clean for many of years. My middle son (father of my 3 year old grandson) does not know her past. I made a comment to my grandson's mother that my grandson's step-mother used to be on drugs. Well....from that point forward (December) I was not allowed to see my grandsons. This is breaking my heart! My grandsons 4th birthday is this weekend, but what can I do??? I want to see him and give him big hugs and kisses and of course his birthday presents.

Any Idea , Suggestions would be appreciated,

Thanks,

I didn't find the right solution from the internet.

Re: Missing my grandsons

Napsal: 12.10.2017 18:59:56
od Maataa
Dear Joeclark,
your situation is not simple. I don´t know many facts, so it isn´t easy to find solution for you and your grandson.
1) Does your son have a contact with his son?
2) Do you have a contact with your son?
3) Do you have a contact with grandson´s mother?
4) How far is your grandson living?

the first way is to communicate with grandson´s mother. Birthday and X-mas are maybe the best occassions for it. If you can´t talk with her, write her. All about how you miss your grandson. And how are you sad. You can give her some suggestion – short meeting with her and him, all time together to ensure her, that your heart is clear. It is the first step. You have to get back her confidence.

Similar way is, if your son don´t communicate with you and he can be with his son. Try to renew the communication, and give really big apologize to your son´s new wife and your son! They must feel that you are really sad what you have said to grandson´s mother. It is the first step. Then the same – short meeting with your son and grandson and building slowly a new confidence.

The only way in all the cases is to renew communication, be truthful and build new confidence. And don´t be hasten! Small steps are also steps and can lead to the same goal.
I hope you will be successfull and happy with your grandson in a near future. Grandparents are important for kids.

P.S. My apologize for mistakes, I hope you´ll understand me.