The question about having sex with children or not, is a question that most pedophiles will meet sooner or later in life.
Crossing The Line
The Dark Side
Everything will change, first of all because you are suddenly doing something that is strictly socially unacceptable and illegal by law. And, since there will be a certain risk of getting caught, thus risk getting totally fucked by both the society and the law enforcement, a certain weight of fear will constantly hang over your shoulders, far into the future. Most of this fear will actually be based on your faith in your child and its ability and motivation to keep your sexual games and relationship a secret.
Second, most people appreciate freedom and security, making one able to sleep well at nights and wake up happy in the morning, and just feel well about life in general. When you cross this line with a child for the first time, you might just discover how much you really appreciated this freedom and security, as it will suddenly become forever threatened. Please note that most children from late toddlerhood and older will also detect these changes, potentially getting the same fears and challenges as yours.
Third, guilt will always be a potential problem for all pedophiles who cross the line, especially among those who are close relatives to the kids whom they have sex with. And most aren't immune to such innocence, and those big and uncertain eyes that look at you. The adult may thus ask himself: am I hurting this child? Is this right of me to do, really?
Fourth, a role change will most likely occur within close family relationships. And, it can be a challenge having the roles of e.g. an authoritative father and a cool lover in the same time, especially if you're inexperienced; just like it will be hard for a child to be e.g. an obedient daughter and a cool lover in the same time. Such a role change may even confuse the child, which is why incest will always be way more crucial than non-incestuous sexual relationships.
Of course, the latter problem may also affect other and similar authoritative relationships, like babysitters, daycare workers, and school teachers.
Finally, there is shame; shame towards doing something that's forbidden and socially despicable; and shame towards being different from the rest; all of which can affect both the adult and the child negatively, the child especially.
Such disturbances in life can have a negative impact on the lives of the both of you. And it can become such a disturbance that it will be hard to feel joy and happiness afterwards, like you did before you crossed the line.
Write any notes and your own knowledge to the discussion topic Discussion to Legal Pedophile's Handbook - Pedophilia.
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